I’ve been trying to find a balance between it all. The work, the work, the play, the writing, the meditation, the feeling of necessity to read more, etc. I think you all know the feeling. The overwhelming weight that presses down on you even when you are doing something that should be shedding that weight.
I’m not sure where the shadows come from.
Lately, I’ve theorized that it’s all from assuming. Assuming that I know something that maybe I don’t. Assuming that other people feel the same way that I do. Assuming that it isn’t always wrong to assume things when they make your life easier.
Because isn’t that why humans have the ability to assume?
Assumption is a simplification tool. We create archetypes and generalized caricatures so that we can survive in this world full of complication and deep-seeded complexity. It’s used to protect us from time, from having to constantly wander into a room full of strangers and suddenly feel the unending urge to learn everything about them. Assumption allows us to focus on a task at hand by assigning someone or something a generalized definition, by creating categories. It’s why we have personality types, it’s how Zodiac signs work and it’s one reason why we are able to be as efficient as we are as a species.
But I think I take it too far. I think we take it too far. I think that the desire to be faster with everything that we are, the massive influx of information that we are constantly receiving, the lack of a filter for that information, and the lack of care to stop for a moment and breathe has turned us into a culture of humans that assumes so much more than we could ever hope to know. Our educated assumptions have turned to libel and slander and we either do not know or do not care (or possibly do not care to know).
The problem, even with this post, is that it is based in assumption. Assumption that what I am saying is true. based solely in feeling and nothing more. I have little to no evidence to back up my claims, but some things you can just feel as they begin to go awry, as they begin to degrade to a lower and lesser sense of what they were. I don’t want to be that anymore. I’ve been trying for some time not to be that and it has been (and will continue to be) such a difficult journey.
So I sit here now, in this commercialized corporate coffee shop, hoping for the assumption to pass with the dying of the night.