The Spectrum of Happiness

“are you an unhappy person?” [it seems like old friendships pay off well, they always seem to be the ones to bring up the most deadly questions.]

“well. I don’t know.”

“you don’t know?”

“Yeah. I don’t know. What does it mean to be unhappy?”

“like to be in a constant state of discontent, to—“

“I’m NOT not happy.”

“ ok. Well then do you mean to say that you ARE happy?”

“no, I’m not that either.”

“well where do you stand on the spectrum?”

“the spectrum of happiness?”

“Yes. Are you in the less happy side or the more happy side?”

“I don’t think it’s a spectrum.”

“ok… what is it?”

“I think it’s a deep river, or a lake, or an ocean.”

“sure I can see that, and —“

“And I am somewhere below the surface.”

“Drowning?”

“No, I’m a fish. Or maybe I’m just a bit of kelp.”

“happiness is an ocean and you are kelp?”

“yeah. I’m standing in it and waving through it. I’m planted in happiness but I’m not exactly willingly participating in it.”

“You’re being forced to grow inside the spectrum of happiness? Is that what you’re saying?”

“Maybe. It’s very hard to explain.”

“Please try. I’m only getting more and more confused.”

“I’m standing in happiness, it is enveloping me, but because it is where I was grown from, it is my base, what I understand. Because happiness is not linear, it is three-dimensional, it has volume, it ebbs and flows and changes like the ocean does with the tide—“

“With the moon—“

“Exactly. And there are other factors in play here as well. Huge oil slicks that come along and poison large portions of happiness.”

“Ok, yeah I get it now.”

“Y’know, I don’t even get it completely, so I’m not sure how you would.”